I’ve never been someone to hide my gay, I mean, if you’ve seen my haircuts over the past couple years, it’s kind of hard to mistake me for a straight girl. But, once in a while, someone either confuses me for straight, or gets drunk enough to cross their fingers and hope I’m a bisexual. I met one such character the other day at a bar – he was talking about how attractive the bartender was, and he turned to me saying something about how I must not notice things like that.
Unfortunately, I knew the bartender.
And, yes, unfortunately for him, she began laughing hysterically.
What came next is why I’ve been inspired to write again, sexual deviants. I was met with what appears to be the first response of all people in his position: “Oh! My sister’s friend is gay and she’s also nice.”
Gay and nice? Wherever did you find this rare specimen, sir?
I have never been able to fully wrap my head around the need for straight people upon meeting me to confirm that I am not the first gay person they’ve ever met. It doesn’t matter if the only gay person they’ve ever met is barely within six degrees of separation, because need to confirm that at one point or another they have interacted with a member of the LGBTQ community is just too strong.
Now, this topic’s been brought up by every lesbian from here to K.D. Lang (which is now, apparently, a destination), about how terrible it is that we assume we all know one another or that the person in question knowing a gay person somewhere doesn’t make us feel more comfortable. To them I say, “maybe,” and then I would probably shrug.
Truth is, the community’s small but I can safely say I don’t know everyone. I had no idea who the guy from the bar’s sister’s friend was – for all I know she could have been smoking hot, single, and hopefully the girl who just moved in a floor below me, though maybe that’s getting a little too specific.
The point is, straight people are great gay networking tools. Many a straight have introduced me to many a gay, and many of those gays have introduced me to large quantities of booze, bad dancing, and, in one case, their vampire den; but that’s a whole other story. It’s not all bad, deviants, when people offer to introduce you to their token gay friend.
And hey, if that friend doesn’t turn out, I’m sure they know a straight person who may even know another gay for you.