Dearest readers, I am drunk on really expensive wine, so I am going to tell you all of my woes. Granted, I write the same while drunk as I do sober, which, I suppose, is a talent.
Here’s the thing, I have so many blog posts in the works right now, but I’m having issues.
What issues, Lauren?
Thanks for asking, dear reader, I am thinking of changing my name to something a little more gender neutral, you see. So I need ideas, because I am not a very good chooser-of-names (which is the technical term, possibly Latin). Send me your name ideas, please!
As I have just caught this, I apologize for the two sentence paragraphs that this post will be made up of. Remember, drunk disclaimer.
While I, or should I say we, pick a name, the new layout, and official website name, is on hold. I know, it’s hard for me too. Upon login I make a very disturbed face, something similar to Lil Wayne drunk .
What else is on the docket? Well, I don’t know if you follow missed connections or not (if you don’t, leave this blog, straighto… p’cha), but I have recently come across my favourite person, quite possibly ever, going off on a very eloquent rant about Faggity Ass Fridays. If you have yet to read this, you can check it out here. Whomever you are, you had better just confess to being, um, awesome, now. I am putting out a reward of three scandalous photos of myself and daily icanhascheezburger highlights for a week to whomever can give me names and locations. Send out the dogs. And by “dogs”, I mean gays.
What else can I update you on? What else can top that picture of Lil Wayne? Liz fucking Feldman. While her middle name is not fucking, at least not as far as I know, it should be. Why? Because I’d get with that. Also, she’s hilarious, dear reader, and you must check her out. Most recently, she’s been working on The Jay Leno Show to come up with gems like this:
Who doesn’t want a Twittering grandmother? I certainly want one, all of my family drama on Twitter? Follow that.
I feel like I’ve exhausted myself at this point, but “keep it locked” for upcoming music posts, and lesbian lolcats. Oh, you just wait.
Have I had any hot chick pictures yet? No? Here you go: