I have someone I just can’t get off of my mind.
The rational part of me, the part that files my taxes and sends thank you letters, would really like for me to forget this person. When I think about them I can’t think about anything else and it’s seriously hampering my ability to, well, function.
I’ve had this feeling before, and when I think back to those people, the people I couldn’t distract myself from, my biggest regret is not showing how I feel adequately enough. Not showing up, not calling back, hiding from the same person I want to be closest to, because I’m a rational person. I think I’m finally, somehow, mature enough to make a seemingly stupid decision, if that makes sense.
I think I’m going to get on a plane. But, I don’t trust myself to get on the return flight, because the part of me that’s not rational – the part that sends flowers half way across the world, the part that plans terribly intricate dates with no regard for the repercussions, that part of me could take over… And I don’t know what happens after that, because I don’t let it happen.
I barely even know you. I’m starting to think I’m the crazy one in this, whatever this is.